Ridiculous Ideas
by AnnieXMuller
Summary: Post-Always. S5. Twitter prompt: She kisses him upside down. Because Castle sometimes has ridiculous ideas.


**AN: Thank you to Mia for this sweet prompt. The prompt itself is the last two lines of the fic, and included in the title of course ;-).**

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This better be real to Kate. It's real to him.

Castle can honestly say he has never felt terrified in a relationship before. Until now.

He thinks this is what it feels like to lose your mind, to be driven mad by fear, because for the first time in his life he's seeing _forever_, and if he screws this up he may never recover.

He spends every morning she will give him at her side, only rolling away from her when the alarm simply cannot be ignored and they have to get up. Even then she has to give him a little shove to get moving. He craves her pliant, lithesome, warm body pressed up against his, and he wants to spend every morning for the rest of his life like this. He's addicted to waking up to find her head on his chest, her arms wrapped around him, a leg thrown across his hip. He's addicted to her scent, to her soft skin and warm eyes. He is addicted to _her_.

She sips her coffee, smiling at him across the counter as he flips pancakes, fumbles, and misses one – and again when he burns his mouth on eggs – and he wonders if she's smiling because she loves him, or because she just thinks him silly.

They arrive at the precinct together, exit the elevator side-by-side at the end of the day, and he enjoys the routine.

In the evenings, they share a meal, a story. She laughs and kisses him, but she still returns to her own apartment more than he likes.

He won't admit that it bothers him a little, losing her to her own place, having to sleep alone.

That's not all that bothers him.

They're keeping it all a secret.

They have to, she has told him. Rules dictate partners cannot form romantic relationships. Knowing this, part of him still wonder _why_ their friends cannot be told.

He feels the quizzical air circulating around Ryan, sees the suspicion in Esposito's eyes, hears Lanie's voice in his head threatening him with bodily harm if he doesn't fess up already (yet when he does fess up, at least in his head, he still gets threatened with disembowelment should he hurt Kate. He can't win with the Lanie in his mind).

He trusts them with this secret. It practically bursts out of him when they are near. But they can't know. Not just yet. She made him swear to that.

And the fear returns.

Because what if it's not real; what if she isn't truly opening up and letting him in like he thinks she is. What if she wonders about his intentions. He has her now; has the thrill of the chase dissolved, has he lost interest? What if that's all this ever was. A chase. A victory.  
And he's already moving on.

He's not. But what if she questions what they have?

So he questions _her, _before the thoughts screaming around in his mind threaten to come out during an argument. One quiet, chilled, evening, a bottle of wine and a meal of Chinese takeout, he sits beside her on his couch, and waits. He chooses his moment carefully, waiting until she has finished her second glass of Merlot, and he can tell from her mannerisms she's feeling just a little buzzed. That's when he inhales a deep breath, stands, and starts to pace.

When his words fail him, when they don't spill as freely from his lips as he had anticipated, he wonders how he ever managed to get a single manuscript published. He gesticulates, his hands trying to express the words his brain cannot remember, the ones his lips and tongue keep from being released, and the emotions he cannot articulate.

He loves her, loves her, loves her. He cannot lose her.

* * *

She reaches for his hand as he moves past her, and stills him. He stops moving, stops talking. She calms him with her thumb sweeping across his knuckles, and soothes him with her tone. She shakes her head at the addled man in front of her, and the worries that consume him.

Of course this is real. _She is in love with him_.

Then she stands, her lips parted in a small O, her eyes bright, because that's the first time she has said those words out loud.

And he collapses down on the couch she just vacated, pure relief surging through him, because that's the first time she has said those words out loud.

He lays along the length of the couch on his back, groaning. His head drops down on the arm-rest, hands covering his face, and she can tell he's feeling foolish for ever questioning her.

She moves to stand behind his head, her fingers running through his hair, smiling at his mortification, loving him even more for it.

She bends down over him, and gently pries his hands away from his face. He tips his head back until his eyes meet hers, and she just shakes her own head at him, at the fears he has shared with her. She places her hands on his cheeks, her thumbs smoothing the slight crinkling at the corners of his eyes. She drops a kiss to his forehead, to remove the lines that have formed there, before she drops another at the top of his nose, between his eyes, where yet more lines have appeared. She kisses his frown away until he has relaxed and a smile begins to appear. She leans over him just a little more so that her lips can meets his. She sucks his lower lips between hers, her nose grazing his chin.

She kisses him upside down. Because Castle sometimes has ridiculous ideas.

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**AN: Just want to say THANK YOU to everyone reading, favoriting, following, and reviewing my fics. I've done my best to reply to all the reviews lately, and I am sorry if I missed a few. But know I GREATLY appreciate each review, and will always try to reply to each one.**


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